Everyone of us has attitude. It can be good, bad, or indifferent. Attitudes can change hourly, daily, weekly or monthly. As we mature we are supposed to control our attitude so that we can function and be a responsible citizen. Teenagers have been branded for their “bad attitudes”. The reality is that they are learning who they are, what to do with their talents and how to handle their emotions. We should give them a break and help them reach the right attitude.
How about you, how is your attitude today? Does it need a slight adjustment or is it requiring a major overhaul? Either way I want to help you by focus on the Six Stages of Attitude Change.
1. Identify Problem Feelings
Our bodies have warning systems to tell us if something is wrong. Pain is usually the alarm. Our nerves highlight flare ups and soreness. That is helpful for us to find the problem and address it with rest or medicine.
Feelings can be helpful as well. Getting our feelings hurt is natural and we all feel it. However, if the foundation of our life is insecurity then we really can’t trust our feelings to help us find solutions.
Take out a pen and write down the feelings that creep in to your life and cause you pain. My list consisted of feelings of pressure on the business, feelings of doubt and feelings of being a bit tired after running so hard. Whatever they are write them down. Next to each one ask yourself if they are founded on insecurity or if the feelings are valid. My doubt feeling, for instance, is an actual feeling, but is not grounded in truth, so I have highlighted it as a problem feeling.
2. Look for Negative Ramifications of Your Problem Feelings
I realized that my feelings of doubt that were based in insecurity around a certain issue of mine easily spread to my attitude in the office. My team could see a personality change in me for a few weeks. I received comments like, “you doing ok?” or “what’s up? Why the sad face?” I would be a horrible poker player as my emotions show up on my face. My feelings affect my attitude and as a normally upbeat and positive guy I had to get to the core of my emotions and understand the poison I was spreading in our culture.
3. Understand both Reality and Hope
Reality then became a friend of mine. I also reacquainted myself with Hope. Reality is an equalizer when it comes to changing your attitude. If you are like me some times your attitude is based on the wrong things, whether good or bad. In my case, once I realized my insecurity and doubt I went to work on it. The very act of getting to the issue gave me hope. It wasn’t as bad as I thought it was. My attitude got resurrected by hope.
4. Choose Your Attitude
The next stage to attitude change is to choose it. For me, I realized that I had allowed the weight of the world (my biz, expectations, etc.) to negatively affect my attitude and thus my personality. So, I faced reality, took up hope and chose to be me again. I am an encourager by trade with belief as an attribute. My attitude was going to be at that level, so I chose it.
5. Practice it Daily Internally and Externally
And so I realized that I was letting life squeeze me and I was not putting into myself enough firepower internally. I immediately began reading again, for me, not my business. Books, music, prayer, friendships, etc. I increased my inspiration and time with God in order to practice my attitude. Externally I simply focused on smiling, breathing, being, encouraging, and on and on.
6. Talk About the Change
Since then I have begun talking about it out loud realizing that sharing it helps validate it. When I talk about attitude change I am really accountable to continue it.
You see, I am convinced that being unintentional about things leads to the death of things. If you are unintentional about your family then you will suffer the consequences of bad relations and a poor family culture. The same is true for business as well as your attitude.
Identify, understand, choose, practice, share. Attitude change can happen, but only when you are ready to get to the core, deal with reality and decide to do something about it.
